Trust

In the daily devotion
http://proverbs31devotions.blogspot.com/

Lisa speaks of trust. How this is exactly what I was struggling with last night and this morning.

Last night I was missing a certain someone, which has been happening a lot. I think the anticipation of his long summer tour makes the situation slightly more tough. I know in a just a few short weeks he will be leaving for long hot warped tour. I also understand that he has a lot of preparation for this tour, and he is very excited to leave.

As I was trying not to bug him insentantly I looked over his blog, and found a entry I was unfamilar with. Back in 2006 ( A month before we officially met, that he remembers) he wrote about his struggles with life descisions and relationships. Why to avoid to them, and how he felt about girls in general.

I cried.

I felt sadden by his struggle, but I also understand because I felt the exact same way about males up until he decided to persue me.

I know now he needs space, which is hardest for me because more than ever before I feel I need him. He calms me down, and I know everything will be okay when he is around. He protects me, and encourages me. Right now he wants nothing to do with me, I need to tell him about our health crisis. About the latest news, that affects him, as well. How is this possible when he won't give me the time of day?

Right now more than ever I feel like God is telling me I need HIM and to rely on HIM instead of the boy. I know this, and I know the Lord will take care of everything. It's still such a struggle.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Isaiah 55:9

"Who ever find's his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."
Mathew 10:39

Love,

Ashley Marie